Monthly Archives: January 2017

The Shotgun Arcana – Book Review

5 out of 5 stars

I called The Six-Gun Tarot a seven layer cake.

This is unabashed second helpings.

Set one year after the events of The Six-Gun Tarot, Jim is a deputy partnered with Mutt. Mutt and Maude are approaching item status much to the chagrin of many town racists. Malachi Bick owns practically everyone and everything in town and someone has begun brutally murdering prostitutes.

An ancient artifact buried beneath the town is luring serial killers from far and wide to Golgotha. (Serial killers who are clever blends of real serial killers.) Trouble once again braves the 40-mile desert to bring suffering, pain and loss to the townspeople and the only ones that can stop them are our motley crew of heroes; Jon Highfather, Mutt, Jim Negrey, Maude Stapleton, Harry Pratt and Clay Turlough. (Introductions to some new bad ass heroes as well.)

This second installment was not a disappointment. When you think to yourself that the author could not possibly add one more element to this, then they do and they do it successfully, it makes you want to weep with joy.

R.S. Belcher, you have one more stalker for life.

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Gin ‘N Dreams

Bizzaro dream snippet brought to you by the brain of Cupcakes and Machetes:

I’m sitting on the floor of a family room in a house I don’t know. I have a giant gift basket full of random things someone gave me. I’m trying to share my chocolates and tootsie rolls with Snoop Dogg. He only wants my flavored tobacco. (And that’s not a lame metaphor for weed. It was literally flavored tobacco like you would smoke in a hooka.)

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Winter of Epic Rain and Ice

Well….poop shite. My winter of epic fantasy is turning out not so epic-y. Michigan is in total non-cooperation mode and determined to only dump rain and ice on us. Unless you live anywhere from northern-lower Michigan on up to the Upper Peninsula, then you’re probably telling me to stop my fucking whining, the alternative is that I could be buried in snow.

But I prefer that! I can handle ALL the snow. I’m just over the rain and bitter fucking cold. It’s making me a bitter fucking person, because all I want is some mood setting for reading. I literally save up my epic fantasy books for this time of year and without said snow, I’m not really motivated to read them. Sure, I finished the Mistborn trilogy. When we had some resemblance of snow. Now I’m in a constant fucking battle with myself trying to figure out what genre I feel like reading, all while trying to pressure myself to read epic fantasy. This shitty weather just makes me want to read Urban Fantasy for some reason and I’m about to give in.

I mean, I picked up The Shotgun Arcana, but I’m having trouble focusing on it. I blame the lack of snow.

So I guess I’ll go outside today, on a date lunch with the husband and flip both middle fingers to the sky because maybe telling Mother Nature to go fuck herself will get me what I want.

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Clovenhoof – Book Review

3 out of 5 stars

Satan has been fired from his position as overlord of Hell. A board was put together and it was deemed that he had been slacking. Cast out onto Earth, Satan, also known as Jeremy Clovenhoof, is forced to live the life of a human. With “help” from his slutty neighbor upstairs and the lonely nerd neighbor across the hall, he does his best to be human.

As one could imagine, funny shenanigans ensue. There wasn’t much resembling a plot until the last 15% of the book where it was all thrown in and then neatly wrapped up with a little red bow.

I was entertained three-quarters of the way through. The last quarter I was just ready to move onto something else. It’s a fun little read but nothing that I’m going to demand that you rush out and buy this second.

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The Mirror Empire – Book Review

Read April 2015

3 out of 5 stars

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Yeah, that’s me. Trying to think of how the hell to write this review.

I mean one of my notes says, “Thumb in butt.” Not mine mind you, but one character checking the anal virginity of another.
Other notes say things like, “Cannibals!” and “dog hair clothes.”

All I can really boil it down to is a list of the good things, the things that made this book so promising and then why it was ultimately flat.

The Good/Interesting Aspects:
– Bear and dog mounts
– Matriarchal/polyamorous society
– Sentient carnivore plants
– Magic based upon the satellite (star) in orbit
– Blood witches
– Tears in the world in which you may travel to another parallel world
– Causing or attempting to stop genocide depending on which playing field you currently stand

The reason this book fell flat? Severe lack of character development. I could hardly connect with any of the characters. The closest I came was some what enjoying Ahkio and that was because he did show slight character development. However, it didn’t matter to me at any point who lived and who died.

The world building was great and had a lot more potential but I felt as though there was more world building that hadn’t been fleshed out by the author and it left it lacking at points. Many times I could not tell which planet we were supposed to be on. Maybe it was my mind wandering but I sometimes felt as if I had missed something important and I would read back a little bit and find nothing amiss.

This wasn’t a book that I was biting at the bit to pick up and keep reading. In fact, I sat it down often and for long periods of time and read something a little more interesting in between. That being said, it was still a good book and I would continue with the second in hopes that the author fixed a few things.

Mint Chocolate Chip Cookies

I’ve been down and out with a stomach virus the last couple of days. So the last thing I’ve been wanting to do is bake (or read) as everything made me nauseous. But my stomach is finally letting me smell/eat/think about real food finally so I thought I would share one of my favorite recipes that I tried during the holidays: Mint Chocolate Chip cookies.

The BEST mint chocolate chip cookies.

I even got to use cream of tartar for the first time. I felt so fancy.

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Do yourself a favor and do it already!

Recipe Here